The Devil Inside (2012)

IMDb plot summary: In Italy, a woman becomes involved in a series of unauthorized exorcisms during her mission to discover what happened to her mother, who allegedly murdered three people during her own exorcism.
Directed by William Brent Bell. Starring Fernanda Andrade, Simon Quarterman, and Evan Helmuth.

The movie starts off well and ends well, but the whole middle is a mess. It jumps from topic to topic to topic, never really tying anything together (except for the fact that demonic possession is apparently contagious). What exactly is the main premise of this movie? Most of the time I thought it was about a girl exploring her mother's possible demonic possession, but then that gets abandoned an hour in and we never return to it. It's just sloppy movie. Too bad it was so muddled, because it had a fantastically atmospheric beginning and a fantastically creepy ending. 1.5 stars.

Flickchart: #1290 out of 1898, below The Secret Life of Walter Mitty and above I'm Not Rappaport.

Chasing Amy (1997)

IMDb plot summary: Holden and Banky are comic book artists. Everything's going good for them until they meet Alyssa, also a comic book artist. Holden falls for her, but his hopes are crushed when he finds out she's a lesbian.
Directed by Kevin Smith. Starring Ben Affleck, Jason Lee, and Joey Lauren Adams.

The only other Kevin Smith movie I've seen was Mallrats, which I hated. And I mean HATED. It's the very lowest-ranked movie on my Flickchart, below awful flicks like The Pacifier and The Santa Clause 3 and even the Star Wars Holiday Special.

So I was a little surprised that I didn't mind this one.

Now, it wasn't all smooth. The movie meanders from topic to topic, and I loathe Jay (of Jay and Silent Bob) with every fiber of my being. But he's only in the movie for about 5 minutes, and the rest of the time it focuses on mostly-decent human beings dealing with things in a confused, but trying-to-be-a-grown-up-about-it kind of way. I found Ben Affleck to be a much more interesting character here than he usually is, and the scene where he confesses his love for Alyssa is great - very moving. It's not a great movie, but it's pretty okay, and that was more than I was expecting.

Flickchart: #923 out of 1897, below Punch-Drunk Love and above Martha Marcy May Marlene.

One For the Money (2012)

IMDb plot summary: Unemployed and newly-divorced Stephanie Plum lands a job at her cousin's bail-bond business, where her first assignment puts her on the trail of a wanted local cop from her romantic past.
Directed by Julie Anne Robinson. Starring Katherine Heigl, Jason O'Mara, Daniel Sunjata and John Leguizamo.

Bleh.

I will admit that my dislike for Katherine Heigl made this movie much less entertaining to watch than it could have been, but I also just didn't like it very much. It was trying to be a fun action comedy romance, but instead of blending those genres together, it just kind of awkwardly jumped between them all to the point where I couldn't tell *what* it was trying to do. None of the characters were particularly memorable or interesting, the plot was thin, the "twist" was something I saw coming a mile away... overall, a completely forgettable movie. And I mean forgettable while in the middle of watching it. 1 star.

Flickchart: #1651 out of 1895, below 101 Dalmatians (1996) and above Open Season.

The Mask (1994)

IMDb plot summary: Bank clerk Stanley Ipkiss is transformed into a manic super-hero when he wears a mysterious mask.
Directed by Chuck Russell. Starring Jim Carrey, Cameron Diaz, Peter Greene and Peter Riegert.


My sister was sitting in the room with me while I watched this movie. She can attest to the fact that I found it infuriatingly bad. (I kept screaming, "WHAT? WHY? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? WHO THOUGHT THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA?")

The thing is, it didn't *have* to be a bad movie. There are so many directions you could go with the premise. Apparently it was based on a series of comics where whoever put the mask on became a psychopathic version of themselves, and the stories were dark horror. That could work. Or it could be a superhero-esque story, with a special talisman that has bizarre side effects. That could work. Or it could be more overtly comedy, a tribute to classic cartoons with - and here's the important part - APPROPRIATE RESPONSES FROM THE SIDE CHARACTERS.

Here's the thing. You can't say "this is a cartoon character in the real world" and then try to create a quasirealistic group of underground thugs. Those aren't the kind of villains that show up in cartoons. If you *do* decide, no, you absolutely HAVE to have modern gritty action thriller villains in the middle of your cartoon, and they're going to be dark and scary and genuinely hurt people, then you have to have them respond appropriately to the fact that THEY JUST SAW A GUY SPIN GLEEFULLY THROUGH A WALL LIKE THE TASMANIAN DEVIL.

You can't have it both ways. You have to either make your other characters cartoony enough that they fit a cartoon world, or confused by magic enough that they fit the real world. Putting them both together makes the most frustrating movie of all time. I couldn't enjoy the cartoon homage because apparently NOBODY BUT JIM CARREY WAS IN A CARTOON. Everybody else was doing a straightforward crime thriller. Not a very interesting one, but certainly something that's full of characters that should react with surprise when THEY SHOOT AT SOMEONE WHO INSTANTLY TRANSFORMS INTO A MATADOR.

The experience of watching this was so annoying that I can't even remember anything positive about it. I just kept screaming at the TV. This is not a movie I care to ever think about again. 0.5 stars.

Flickchart: #1843 out of 1894, below Cinderella II and above The Christmas Shoes.

There's Something About Mary (1998)

IMDb plot summary: A man gets a chance to meet up with his dream girl from high school, even though his date with her back then was a complete disaster.

Directed by Peter and Bobby Farrelly. Starring Cameron Diaz, Ben Stiller,and Matt Dillon.

Aside from Ben Stiller being a very likable lead, there's not really much to enjoy about this movie for me. It's not even the gross-out comedy here, which most people would object to. It's how ridiculously over-the-top it all is. As an example: every single scene with the dog. Every single joke they made about the dog, whether it was sedated and accidentally set on fire or hyped up and attacking visitors, was so drawn out and ridiculous that it just made me roll my eyes and think, "Really?" And that's pretty much how most of the movie made me feel. There were one or two good moments, and I appreciated the heart behind the movie, but the Farrelly brothers and I are on pretty different pages when it comes to comedy, it seems. 1.5 stars.

Flickchart: #1269 out of 1893, below Get Smart and above Eagle Eye.

Smashed (2012)

IMDb plot summary: A married couple whose bond is built on a mutual love of alcohol gets their relationship put to the test when the wife decides to get sober.
Directed by James Ponsoldt. Starring Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Aaron Paul, Octavia Spencer and Nick Offerman.

Reminiscent of the excellent Days of Wine and Roses, this is a tragic story about an alcoholic couple whose marriage dissolves after one of them decides to go sober. The writing is pretty solid, but it's the acting here that really makes the difference, specifically Mary Elizabeth Winstead's. Her performance is incredible. This is an excellent little drama that's well worth seeing. 4 stars.

Flickchart: #478 out of 1892, below Philadelphia and above The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes.

Top Gun (1986)

IMDb plot summary: As students at the Navy's elite fighter weapons school compete to be best in the class, one daring young flyer learns a few things from a civilian instructor that are not taught in the classroom.

Directed by Tony Scott. Starring Tom Cruise, Kelly McGillis, and Val Kilmer.

Well, I am very much not the target audience for this movie. I feel like this is the plane equivalent of The Fast and the Furious. Lots of flying and pretty thin plot. The flying looks cool sometimes, but it's not enough to keep me interested. Tom Cruise doesn't really do much but smile and look smug, playing a character I do not particularly like. Definitely not something I'd ever bother to watch again. 2 stars.

Flickchart: #1408 out of 1891, below The Omen and above Mulan.