Monday, March 15, 2021

End of Days (1999)

IMDb plot summary: At the end of the century, Satan visits New York in search of a bride. It's up to an ex-cop who now runs an elite security outfit to stop him.
Directed by Peter Hyams. Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Gabriel Byrne, Robin Tunney, and Kevin Pollak.

This movie is absolutely ridiculous, but not in a fun or interesting way. The woman being protected is an extremely poorly-written character, with no agency or personality whatsoever. The camerawork frequently relies on unjustified shaky shots that made me a little sick for no good reason, as well as way-too-fast-to-be-useful editing. The film is hilariously confused on whether firearms are or are not effective weapons against Satan, because while they want him to be beyond the reach of mere mortal tools, you can't NOT have your action hero coming in with guns ablazing. Even with the script attempts to be mildly thoughtful, such as the flashback to the protagonist's family when they were alive, is muddled by the script's unclear motivations. This film is a hot mess, and a boring one to boot.

How it entered my Flickchart:
End of Days < The Beach
End of Days < Big Business
End of Days < VeggieTales: The Star of Christmas
End of Days > The Art of War
End of Days < Stand Up and Cheer!
End of Days > Me Before You
End of Days < Pokemon: The First Movie
End of Days < Detour
End of Days < Yes Man
End of Days < Breach
End of Days < Song of the South
End of Days > Avalanche
Final spot: #3066 out of 3326, or 8%.

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