Night Swim (2024)

IMDb plot summary: A family moves into a new home, unaware that a dark secret from the house's past will unleash a malevolent force in the backyard pool.

Directed by Bryce McGuire. Starring Wyatt Russell, Kerry Condon, and Amélie Hoeferle.

Night Swim follows a former baseball player and his family who buy a home with a pool so he can do water therapy for his MS. While the water seems to do wonders for his illness, the rest of the family starts seeing unsettling visions of a creature in the water, and they start unraveling the mystery. Look, as someone who can't swim and finds water inherently scary, I was all prepared to be unsettled by this, but it doesn't take any advantage of the premise at all. I didn't find a single actual scare in here, and I was the prime audience! On top of that, the rules of the evil make very little sense in an irritating way, the dialogue is full of terrible exposition, and the acting is pretty thin. A good campy low-budget horror is a lot of fun, but this isn't that, it's just disappointingly bland all the way through.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Night Swim < Selma

Night Swim < Frozen River

Night Swim > Mission to Mars

Night Swim > The World Is Not Enough

Night Swim < The Goonies

Night Swim > The Expendables

Night Swim < Domestic Disturbance

Night Swim < A Midsummer Night's Dream (1935)

Night Swim < On the Town

Night Swim < Bad Moms

Night Swim > The Italian Job (2003)

Night Swim < Batman Begins

Final spot: #3078 out of 3866, or 20%.

The Virtuous Sin (1930)

IMDb plot summary: Marya is the wife of medical student Victor Sablin, who finds it impossible to deal with military life when he is inducted into the Russian army during World War I.

Directed by George Cukor and Louis J. Gasnier. Starring Walter Huston, Kay Francis, and Kenneth MacKenna.

The Virtuous Sin tells the story of a scientist couple who get married despite the woman thinking of him as only a friend. When he is drafted into the army and gets himself in trouble with his commanding officer, she decides to try and seduce the general in hopes of getting him a reprieve. This is absolutely a pre-Code film, as it gets away with insinuating far more saucy plot details than a film could a few years later. The Internet dubs this a comedy, but it's possible that much of the comedy is rooted in social mores I no longer have connections to, because it struck me as a lighthearted drama more than anything else -- friendly characters more than jokes. It's an engaging enough watch, and both our primary leads, Kay Francis and Walter Huston, bring charisma to their roles. 1930 really had a thing for showing women going against the societal grain, usually resulting in their own downfall, so it's nice to see something work out for a woman for once. An interesting little flick.

How it entered my Flickchart:

The Virtuous Sin > Skyfall

The Virtuous Sin < Dark Passage

The Virtuous Sin > All That Jazz

The Virtuous Sin < Waking Ned Devine

The Virtuous Sin < Signs

The Virtuous Sin < The Miracle Worker

The Virtuous Sin > Can You Ever Forgive Me?

The Virtuous Sin < Targets

The Virtuous Sin < The Brood

The Virtuous Sin > The Detective

The Virtuous Sin > Garbo Talks

The Virtuous Sin > Laurence Anyways

Final spot: #1411 out of 3865, or 63%.

Lift (2024)

IMDb plot summary: Follows a master thief and his Interpol Agent ex-girlfriend who team up to steal $500 million in gold bullion being transported on an A380 passenger flight.

Directed by F. Gary Gray. Starring Kevin Hart, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, and Sam Worthington.

Lift is about a team of art thieves, lead by Kevin Hart, who are asked by Interpol to steal a shipment of gold that would be used to pay for terrorist actions. It's your straightforward team heist movie, complete with fun gadgets, a large casts, and some big adventurous twists. The tone of the movie is right on -- light, playful, friendly. The problem is that we don't actually get enough time with our ensemble cast or glimpses into their personality or roles in the story, so we don't feel the same camaraderie that we get in other ensemble heist films like Ocean's Eleven or Sneakers. It makes it feel a little bit like a knock-off version of one of those better stories that took a shortcut through character development to make way for cool set pieces. Granted, the character development bar for this genre isn't extremely high, so it doesn't destory the film by any means, just settles it into a place of mediocrity. A perfectly okay movie with nothing special to recommend it.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Lift < Captain Phillips

Lift > Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Lift < Stepmom

Lift > Cinderella (2015)

Lift > The Hot Rock

Lift > Bee Movie

Lift > Withnail & I

Lift > Nightmare Alley (2021)

Lift < Kicking and Screaming (1995)

Lift < Confessions of a Shopaholic

Lift < Fun and Fancy Free

Lift > Guarding Tess

Final spot: #2429 out of 3864, or 37%.

Flora and Son (2023)

IMDb plot summary: A single mom at war with her son is trying to find a hobby for him. One day, she rescues a guitar from a dumpster.

Directed by John Carney. Starring Eve Hewson, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Orén Kinlan.

Flora and Son is the newest movie from John Carney, who always delivers charming music-centric films, most notably Once and Sing Street. This isn't quite as great as either of those, but it's still a lovely watch. Flora of the title is an irresponsible mother trying to keep her teenage son, Max, from getting himself in trouble with the law. Over the course of the movie they both discover they share a newfound love for making music. There's more suspension of disbelief required to buy into the emotional beats of this movie than Carney sometimes asks of his audience, but it works overall. The final scene is particularly charming, as other people who have played a role in Flora and her son's musical journey join them for the Big Musical Number, and it's impossible not to smile through it. Definitely worth watching, especially if stories about musicians and the arts are already an easy sell for you, but it didn't sweep me away the way I hoped it would.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Flora and Son > Skyfall

Flora and Son < Key Largo

Flora and Son > Don't Look Up

Flora and Son < Waking Ned Devine

Flora and Son < Signs

Flora and Son < The Miracle Worker

Flora and Son > The Long Day Closes

Flora and Son > Quartet

Flora and Son < Metal Lords

Flora and Son > Ping Pong Playa

Flora and Son > The Taking of Pelham One Two Three

Final spot: #1397 out of 3863, or 64%.

Knock at the Cabin (2023)

IMDb plot summary: While vacationing, a girl and her parents are taken hostage by armed strangers who demand that the family make a choice to avert the apocalypse.

Directed by M. Night Shyamalan. Starring Dave Bautista, Jonathan Groff, and Ben Aldridge.

Knock at the Cabin is a home invasion movie about a couple and their young daughter being held hostage by four strangers who claim that the world will end unless one of the family members is willingly sacrificed. This is Shyamalan's best script in a LONG time (possibly because he adapted it from an earlier draft rather than starting from scratch -- he should do that more often!) and it does an excellent job of bringing out the existential terror of the apocalypse. Dave Bautista gives an especially good dramatic performance, weighing his character down a mix of tragedy and compassion. I also understand people who were unhappy with the ending -- I understand it differs significantly from the book -- but the story as a whole is crafted well enough that the ending oddly didn't seem to matter as much to me. It feels like it's not about how it ends but the decisions that are made along the way. A movie that makes me remember why I liked Shyamalan back in the old days.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Knock at the Cabin > Skyfall

Knock at the Cabin > Dark Passage

Knock at the Cabin > The White Tiger

Knock at the Cabin < Fright Night (1985)

Knock at the Cabin > The Gods Must Be Crazy

Knock at the Cabin < Heathers

Knock at the Cabin < It Follows

Knock at the Cabin < Nosferatu

Knock at the Cabin > The Producers (2005)

Knock at the Cabin > Spirited

Knock at the Cabin < Life of Brian

Final spot: #350 out of 3862, or 91%.

Fast and Loose (1930)

IMDb plot summary: A wealthy family is thrown into turmoil when the daughter falls for the family chauffeur and the son begins to keep company with a chorus girl.

Directed by Fred C. Newmeyer. Starring Miriam Hopkins, Carole Lombard, and Frank Morgan.

Fast and Loose is a 1930 romantic drama about two rich siblings who each fall in love with lower-class partners and have to navigate that social scenario. It was fun to see a very young Carole Lombard in the role of the chorus girl who falls in love with the rich young man, as well as Frank Morgan as the rich father. Other than that, though, this a pretty thin story. It depends on two different love stories and, at least in the ending, frames them as equally important, but we hardly ever see Lombard's plot -- it's maybe 2 minutes total of them interacting. The love story that does get more attention is centered heavily on him taunting her for being a useless, foolish woman, which isn't terribly captivating either, even if it's meant playfully. The final scene puts a more interesting spin on the story, but it's too little, too late in a love story with very little to lean on.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Fast and Loose < Skyfall

Fast and Loose > The Fortune Cookie

Fast and Loose < Quigley Down Under

Fast and Loose > Paycheck

Fast and Loose < The Hot Rock

Fast and Loose > Hollywood Stargirl

Fast and Loose < Spinning Into Butter

Fast and Loose > Der Parfumeur

Fast and Loose < Pal Joey

Fast and Loose < Innocence Unprotected

Fast and Loose > The Deep

Fast and Loose < And Then There Were None

Final spot: #2576 out of 3861, or 33%.

Shame (2011)

IMDb plot summary: A sex addict's carefully cultivated private life falls apart after his sister arrives for an indefinite stay.

Directed by Steve McQueen. Starring Michael Fassbender, Carey Mulligan, and James Badge Dale.

Shame stars Michael Fassbender as a man with sex addiction who finds himself struggling to make real-world emotional connections. Like so many of the best films dealing with issues of addiction, there's a deeply grimy and unpleasant sheen to this whole film, and our main character Brandon's sexual encounters aren't shown to us in a way that's at all erotic, just dismal and empty, particularly during the final third. The ending is deliberately ambiguous, and while I like that choice on paper, it didn't land quite as well as I wanted it to -- I think I needed a bit more wind-down aftermath than we got, for it to wholly grip me. That being said, though, this is a fascinating movie and one that I think is going to sit with me the more I think about it. Writing a review right after watching it almost feels a little unfair, like I haven't fully finished it, because this one needs time to digest. I may have to mentally revisit it in a month or so and see if it's settled into a more clear place in my mind.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Shame > Arthur Christmas

Shame < Key Largo

Shame < Don't Look Up

Shame > Is It Fall Yet?

Shame > Spider-Man 2

Shame > Kiss Me Kate

Shame > Battle Royale

Shame < Die Hard

Shame > Incendies

Shame > The Salesman

Shame < The Night Before

Final spot: #1466 out of 3860, or 62%.

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia (2024)

IMDb plot summary: Inspired by true events that occurred during the fierce rivalry between Germany (Audi) and Italy (Lancia) at the 1983 Rally World Championships.

Directed by Stefano Mordini. Starring Daniel Brühl, Riccardo Scamarcio, and Katie Clarkson-Hill.

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia portrays the rivalry between car manufacturers Audi and Lancia to win the 1983 Rally World Championship. Our focus is on Lancia, the underdog who has yet to win and is scrambling to keep up with Audi's technological advances. This film was certainly not helped by the fact that I had just watched Ford V. Ferrari in the last couple months, because this absolutely feels like a cheap knock-off, all the way down to the personal drama between the team manager and the "Stick It To the Man" driver. This one isn't particularly well-written, well-acted, or well-filmed, and the racing scenes are far from riveting. The character development we do get is thin and rushes through emotional beats that should take their time. My viewings of 2024 releases are not off to a terribly exciting start.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia < Arthur Christmas

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia < The Fortune Cookie

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia > No More Baths

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia > Superman II

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia < Big Business

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia < Passion (1996)

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia > Quitting

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia < From Here to Eternity

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia < Talk to Her

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia < Beaches

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia > The Final Countdown

Race for Glory: Audi vs. Lancia > Party Girl

Final spot: #3102 out of 3859, or 20%.

Cradle Will Rock (1999)

IMDb plot summary: A true story of politics and art in the 1930s U.S., focusing on a leftist musical drama and attempts to stop its production.

Directed by Tim Robbins. Starring Hank Azaria, Emily Watson, and John Turturro.

Cradle Will Rock is a historical drama about the 1937 musical production Cradle Will Rock, a leftist pro-union show that was abruptly shut down before its transfer to Broadway. The film follows the production up through its opening night, as well as highlighting several other events that, while not strictly accurate in terms of historical timeline, help to paint a picture of a general attitude surrounding art and politics in the 1930s.

I knew absolutely nothing about this movie going into it, and having seen it, my main question is, "WHY had nobody recommended this to me before?!" A movie about the power of musical theater is already basically tailor-made for me, let alone the political commentary. I'm a little stunned I didn't know about it! While the soul-stirring final performance of the musical is the movie's highlight, I really love all the little stories we have running throughout. In perfect ensemble drama fashion, each one hits its essential narrative pieces without ever overstaying its welcome, and we get completely delightful performances in smaller roles -- Vanessa Redgrave is my personal favorite. That ending musical performance takes up a good chunk of the film's runtime, but it well deserves it, and it helps everything hit home. While we'll see if it wows me as much on a rewatch, I was thoroughly delighted with this movie on my first viewing, and I'm so glad I finally got to see it.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Cradle Will Rock > Arthur Christmas

Cradle Will Rock > Dark Passage

Cradle Will Rock > The White Tiger

Cradle Will Rock > Dead Ringers

Cradle Will Rock < The Philadelphia Story

Cradle Will Rock < Mirai

Cradle Will Rock > Hot Fuzz

Cradle Will Rock > Speed

Cradle Will Rock < Dial M for Murder

Cradle Will Rock > Schindler's List

Cradle Will Rock < Room

Cradle Will Rock > A Quiet Place

Final spot: #190 out of 3858, or 95%.

Aakrosh (2010)

IMDb plot summary: The Central Bureau of Investigation deputes two officers to investigate the disappearance of three medical students, which they believe to be an incident of 'honour killing' in a small, closed community.

Directed by Priyadarshan. Starring Ajay Devgn, Akshaye Khanna, and Bipasha Basu.

Aakrosh is an Indian crime drama about two outside police officers investigating the kidnapping of three young men in a town where everyone absolutely refuses to talk to the police. The two officers try to solve the mystery without bringing the corrupt local police down on the citizens. This one is a pretty slow burn at around two and a half hours of runtime, but in the final third it really all comes together. The tensions keep escalating, both on a large scale and for individual characters' stakes, and I really appreciate how the story wraps up. Crime dramas are often not a genre that appeals to me, but there's something about the slightly melodramatic tone of a lot of Bollywood films that makes it a more interesting narrative to me than the gritty realism American cinema leans into.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Aakrosh < Arthur Christmas

Aakrosh > The Fortune Cookie

Aakrosh > Quigley Down Under

Aakrosh > L.A. Confidential

Aakrosh < Free Guy

Aakrosh > Shame (1968)

Aakrosh < Near Dark

Aakrosh > Hollywood Homicide

Aakrosh < Last Holiday

Aakrosh > Chocolat

Aakrosh > The Tinder Swindler

Final spot: #2088 out of 3857, or 46%.

Till (2022)

IMDb plot summary: In 1955, after Emmett Till is murdered in a brutal lynching, his mother vows to expose the racism behind the attack while working to have those involved brought to justice.

Directed by Chinonye Chukwu. Starring Danielle Deadwyler, Jalyn Hall, and Frankie Faison.

Till is a biopic about the lynching of Emmett Till in the 1950s, and his mother's efforts to bring about justice for his killing. As you hmight expect from the subject matter, this is a heavy story. Till's mother Mamie is played beautifully by Danielle Deadwyler, moving believably between the moments of enormous emotion and the times where she has to steel herself to get through her work. There were pieces of this story I did not know that were told very effectively here -- for example, I was slightly taken aback by the graphicness of the dead body, but then when Mamie decides to hold an open casket funeral for her son, I immediately understood and agreed that it was essential for us as the audience to also see that body in its bloated, discolored horror. No telling of this story is going to have much of a resolution -- history doesn't allow for that resolution -- but it's an important piece of our history that continues to be far too relevant to today, and this version is an effective and powerful way to pass on that history.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Till > Arthur Christmas

Till > Dark Passage

Till < The White Tiger

Till < Onward

Till < Shiva Baby

Till > The African Queen

Till < Coming to America

Till < The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

Till < Once Were Warriors

Till > Identity

Till > VeggieTales: A Snoodle’s Tale

Till > Hairspray Live!

Final spot: #896 out of 3856, or 77%.

The Hundred-Foot Journey (2014)

IMDb plot summary: The Kadam family leaves India for France where they open a restaurant directly across the road from Madame Mallory's Michelin-starred eatery.

Directed by Lasse Hallström. Starring Helen Mirren, Om Puri, and Manish Dayal.

The Hundred-Foot Journey tells the story of an Indian family who journeys to France to set up an Indian restaurant in a town that has no reference point for those kinds of flavors. They happened to set up their restaurant across the street from a Michelin star-ranked restaurant specializing in French cuisine, and the two are quickly in competition. This is one of those movies that I watch and I think, “This is something my mother would like to watch.” It's sweet, with likable characters, and nobody in here is unredeemable and everybody gives nice performances. There's nothing wrong with that, but it would have been fun to have something a little bit more substantial in this. It may have soured for me in that the movie takes a strange plot turn about halfway through, with most of the initial plot setup being suddenly resolved, and I'm less convinced by the new plot it decides to follow. I will say though, as should be the case with all food movies, everything looks delicious. An unremarkable but sweet little movie.

How it entered my Flickchart:

The Hundred-Foot Journey < Arthur Christmas

The Hundred-Foot Journey > Goldfinger

The Hundred-Foot Journey < No Highway in the Sky

The Hundred-Foot Journey < Burlesque

The Hundred-Foot Journey > Andrei Rublev

The Hundred-Foot Journey > McLintock!

The Hundred-Foot Journey > Amen.

The Hundred-Foot Journey > Nine

The Hundred-Foot Journey > Beach Party

The Hundred-Foot Journey > Paradise

The Hundred-Foot Journey > Follow Thru

The Hundred-Foot Journey < Master Harold and the Boys

Final spot: #2644 out of 3844, or 31%.

The Boy and the Heron (2023)

IMDb plot summary: A young boy named Mahito yearning for his mother ventures into a world shared by the living and the dead. There, death comes to an end, and life finds a new beginning. A semi-autobiographical fantasy from the mind of Hayao Miyazaki.

Directed by Hayao Miyazaki. Starring Soma Santoki, Masaki Suda, and Kô Shibasaki.

The Boy and the Heron is the newest film from Japanese filmmaker Hayao Miyazaki. It tells the story of a young boy whose father remarries after the wife's death, and as the boy settles into the new home with his new mother, he encounters a strange heron who promises who bring him to his mother. This is a much more symbolic, surreal story than many of Miyazaki's, full of dreamy sequences that don't feel like they are a representation of the adventures the boy is going through so much as that it's a journey through his subconscious. While that sometimes works for me, I don't resonate with it as much here, certainly not like I do with other Miyazaki movies. However, as always, the creature and set design of this world are gorgeous, and it does manage to narratively pull it all together in the final few moments in a way I found very creatively satisfying. I'd like to revisit it again someday now that I know not to expect such a straightforward adventure storyline.

How it entered my Flickchart:

The Boy and the Heron > The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

The Boy and the Heron > The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

The Boy and the Heron < The White Tiger

The Boy and the Heron < Onward

The Boy and the Heron < Shiva Baby

The Boy and the Heron < The African Queen

The Boy and the Heron < Mister Roberts

The Boy and the Heron > Kiss Me, Stupid!

The Boy and the Heron < Steven Universe: The Movie

The Boy and the Heron < The Phantom of the Opera at the Royal Albert Hall

The Boy and the Heron > Guilty As Sin

The Boy and the Heron < Robin Hood (1973)

Final spot: #946 out of 3855, or 75%.

Oppenheimer (2023)

IMDb plot summary: The story of American scientist J. Robert Oppenheimer and his role in the development of the atomic bomb.

Directed by Christopher Nolan. Starring Cillian Murphy, Emily Blunt, and Matt Damon.

Oppenheimer is, of course, Christopher Nolan’s biopic of J. Robert Oppenheimer, who was fundamental in creating the atomic bomb. In traditional Nolan nonlinear fashion, we hop around between Oppenheimer's early days, his work during World War 2, a revoking of his security clearance years later based on his communist associations during the McCarthy era, and finally a hearing where one of the senators who worked with him is interrogated about their connection. People said to see this one in the theater and I really should have. The sequences involving the bombs are big and terrifying and all-encompassing in a way that I can see would be incredibly emotionally effective in a dark theater with the sound all around you on an enormous screen. Heck, it was effective enough on a tiny tablet 5 inches from my face. I also really enjoy the twist in the final quarter of the film, which I won't give away, but which was something I probably should have seen coming, and the fact that I didn't is a good indicator that I was wrapped up enough in the narrative that it distracted me and I was taken by surprise. The film does get a little bit muggy in its exploration of the ethics of creating this kind of weapon. It plays with that idea a little bit but muddles it up with questions about McCarthyism and witch hunts in a way that I think doesn't serve it well. And of course, there's the problem that we have with all movies in this genre of difficult genius, which is that Oppenheimer is a deeply unpleasant man to spend 3 1/2 hours with. So while I think the technical elements are pretty flawless and the storytelling is effective, it's not a game changer for me and I certainly don't think it's Nolan's best work. But absolutely still worth a watch.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Oppenheimer > The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Oppenheimer < The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

Oppenheimer > The Tragedy of Macbeth

Oppenheimer > Memories of Murder

Oppenheimer < Happy Feet

Oppenheimer < The Faculty

Oppenheimer > Wonder Man

Oppenheimer > Friday the 13th

Oppenheimer > Men Without Women

Oppenheimer > A Nightmare on Elm Street

Oppenheimer > A Christmas Carol (1951)

Oppenheimer > Pain and Glory

Final spot: #1144 out of 3854, or 70%.

Anna (2019)

IMDb plot summary: Beneath Anna Poliatova's striking beauty lies a secret that will unleash her indelible strength and skill to become one of the world's most feared government assassins.

Directed by Luc Besson. Starring Sasha Luss, Helen Mirren, and Luke Evans.

Anna is a story about a Russian spy/secret agent trying to earn her freedom through a series of missions. I'm not going to say much more than that because the film unfolds in a fun nonlinear way, where it keeps hopping around showing us different pieces of the story at different times. There's a definite playful campiness to this that I'm not sure is deliberate. It feels like it's trying a little bit to be completely earnest, but I can’t always tell, and this comes into play especially in the ending. Again, I’m trying not to give too much away, but the flashy crime story we were telling becomes unusually heartfelt in a way that wraps up very tidily and while it is kind of charming, it also feels… accidental. Looking back on Besson’s body of work though makes me inclined to think it is deliberate, which makes me like it more, because that ending really brings out the small moments of humanity that are present throughout. Oh, yeah, and there are some fun flashy action moments too. 

How it entered my Flickchart:

Anna < The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Anna > Goldfinger

Anna > No Highway in the Sky

Anna > Top Gun

Anna < Free Guy

Anna > A Hard Day’s Night

Anna > Licorice Pizza

Anna > The Ten Commandments: The Musical

Anna > National Theatre Live: The Habit of Art

Anna < Mrs. Miniver

Anna > Twisted Nerve

Final spot: #2051 out of 3851, or 47%.

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone (2013)

IMDb plot summary: A veteran Vegas magician tries to revive his career after his longtime partner quits, he gets fired from his casino act, and an edgy new "street magician" steals his thunder.

Directed by Don Scardino. Starring Steve Carell, Steve Buscemi, and Olivia Wilde.

The incredible Burt Wonderstone is a comedy starring Steve Carell and Steve Buscemi as a pair of Las Vegas magicians, but when Carell’s ego gets a little too big, he breaks up the pair and has to try to make it on his own. This is an extremely strange movie, in that it occasionally seems to forget it's a comedy and plays the dramatic moments of Carell learning to humble himself very straight. There's nothing wrong with dramedies, except that the rest of the movie is extremely broad in its humor and the two moods don't mesh well at all. The comedic moments that work the best are the ones focusing on Jim Carrey as a new stage magician who isn't actually doing magic so much as just doing horribly unsafe self harm actions that nobody else wants to and bragging about how he can handle it. It  captures something about the strange prank culture that kind of took over YouTube, and while some of it goes so far as to be unpleasant rather than funny, that works at its core. And the dramatic moments also work at their core. Carell is a talented dramatic actor, so while most of his humor doesn't land here, the scenes where he genuinely tries to learn from his aging magician hero (Alan Arkin) are as good as anything as you would see in a TV biopic... which is to say not great, but certainly serviceable. This feels like an attempt at two different movies smashed together in one, and while either one could have worked on their own, the two together make for a weird unsettling mix.

How it entered my Flickchart:

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone < The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone > War and Peace (1956)

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone > Call Me By Your Name

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone > Legend

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone < Free Guy

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone > Camp Rock 2: The Final Jam

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone > The Baby-Sitters Club

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone > The Meyerowitz Stories (New and Selected)

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone < Muppet Treasure Island

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone > New Faces

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone > National Theatre Live: The Habit of Art

Final spot: #2056 out of 3853, or 47%.

The House With a Clock in Its Walls (2018)

IMDb plot summary: A young orphan named Lewis Barnavelt aids his magical uncle in locating a clock with the power to bring about the end of the world.

Directed by Eli Roth. Starring Jack Black, Cate Blanchett, and Owen Vaccaro.

The House With a Clock in Its Walls is a fantastical children's movie about a young boy who goes to live with his mysterious wizard uncle, played by Jack Black, after his parents’ death. He struggles to make friends in school, however, and ultimately he makes some decisions in search of popularity that cause some serious magical chaos. I'm a little surprised it didn't take off more than it did. Yes, it's a little similar to other magical wizard children's stories, but it's heartfelt and charming, even if it does have a clear children's veneer of hopefulness and cuteness. Kyle McLaughlin is the big bad is an absolute delight, and the cast as a whole isn't afraid to let this be the lighthearted cute kids movie that it is. It's not the best kids movie, but it’s certainly enjoyable enough.

How it entered my Flickchart:

The House With a Clock in Its Walls > The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

The House With a Clock in Its Walls < Dark Passage

The House With a Clock in Its Walls < Nobody’s Fool

The House With a Clock in Its Walls < The Glass Menagerie (1973)

The House With a Clock in Its Walls < 12 Angry Men (1997)

The House With a Clock in Its Walls > The Lair of the White Worm

The House With a Clock in Its Walls > The Cable Guy

The House With a Clock in Its Walls < The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad

The House With a Clock in Its Walls > Gold Diggers of 1933

The House With a Clock in Its Walls > Jeff, Who Lives At Home

The House With a Clock in Its Walls > The Mummy (1999)

The House With a Clock in Its Walls > The Wrestler

Final spot: #1821 out of 3852, or 53%.

Goosebumps (2015)

IMDb plot summary: A teenager teams up with the daughter of young-adult horror author R.L. Stine after the writer's imaginary demons are set free on the town of Madison, Delaware.

Directed by Rob Letterman. Starring Jack Black, Dylan Minnette, and Odeya Rush.

Goosebumps is a children's horror movie based on the books of the same name by R.L. Stine. In fact, Stine himself is a character in the movie, played by Jack Black. In this story, all Stine's terrifying creatures from his books are capable of coming to life, and the new kid in town accidentally sets them all free, so he, his friends, and Stine himself have to figure out how to lock them all back up. This is a fun creative concept for this story, although I'm sure it would have been much more interesting and effective for me if I had actually been a fan of the stories to begin with. I wasn't allowed to read them as a child, so I missed out on any nostalgia or Easter eggs that could have been hidden in this film. As a story in and of itself, it's actually pretty entertaining. The wide variety of horrifying creatures and the different ways they have to defeat each of them keeps the story moving quickly, and while the romance between the two leads doesn't really make a lot of sense, it does have a narratively satisfying ending. There aren't enough scary movies for kids these days, so it's probably worth checking out for younger viewers just as something different. And I bet adult fans of the books will get a kick out of it as well.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Goosebumps > The Gray Man

Goosebumps < Dark Passage

Goosebumps > Dan in Real Life

Goosebumps < Waking Ned Devine

Goosebumps > Logan

Goosebumps < There Will Be Blood

Goosebumps < Moonwalker

Goosebumps > The Horse's Mouth

Goosebumps < The Sound of Music

Goosebumps > Westfront 1918

Goosebumps < Men in Black

Goosebumps < Akira

Final spot: #1298 out of 3834, or 66%.

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle (2018)

IMDb plot summary: A human child raised by wolves must face off against a menacing tiger named Shere Khan, as well as his own origins.

Directed by Andy Serkis. Starring Christian Bale, Cate Blanchett, and Benedict Cumberbatch.

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle is a pretty uninspiring version of The Jungle Book. It follows the familiar story of the human who is found abandoned in the Indian jungle and ends up being raised and cared for by a pack of wolves, a panther, and a bear, while fending off attacks from other animals, particularly a tiger. This one includes a frequently confusing series of messages about people "belonging with their kind" in a way that doesn't ever actually resolve well or coherently. The voice acting features some big name players but feels mostly phoned in, with only Benedict Cumberbatch as Shere Khan really seeming to enjoy the role at all. On top of that, it just looks off. The CGI animals looks strangely dated for a movie made in 2018, and it all just looks more like a video game than the lush jungle nature realism it's clearly going for. I haven't seen the live action Disney version that came out around the same time, but I kind of assume it has to be better than this just by virtue of having some good songs in it. You can skip this one.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle < The Gray Man

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle > Beauty and the Bestie

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle < Outbreak

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle < Follow Thru

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle < The Forger

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle > Baby Boom

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle > The Return of the Pink Panther

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle < Pride and Prejudice (1940)

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle < Red Cliff

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle < Stand and Deliver

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle > The Doorway to Hell

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle < After the Thin Man

Final spot: #2783 out of 3833, or 27%.

Deep Impact (1998)

IMDb plot summary: A comet is discovered to be on a collision course with Earth. As doomsday nears, the human race prepares for the worst.

Directed by Mimi Leder. Starring Robert Duvall, Téa Leoni, and Elijah Wood.

Most of my life I just thought of Deep Impact as being “the other asteroid movie that wasn't Armageddon.” And while both films do deal with a celestial object that is on a collision course with the earth for an extinction level event, Armageddon primarily deals with the attempt to dismantle the asteroid, while Deep Impact spends a lot more time on the earth with the people who are actually having to come to terms with the fact that they are in their final days. That to me is a much more compelling story, even if it occasionally is told clumsily here. There are some genuinely thoughtful and well scripted moments where characters realize either they or someone they love is not going to make it into the bunker that will shelter humanity from extinction. And the scenes of destruction and damage to the earth seem a lot more, no pun intended, impactful than they were in Michael Bays’ explosion-happy style. The movie absolutely has clunky points where exposition is awkward and characters have abrupt changes of heart for no real reason, but there are more high points to this one than I expected.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Deep Impact > The Blues Brothers

Deep Impact < The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

Deep Impact < Nobody’s Fool

Deep Impact < The Glass Menagerie

Deep Impact < 12 Angry Men (1997)

Deep Impact > David Copperfield (1935)

Deep Impact > 2046

Deep Impact > Connie and Carla

Deep Impact > Hamlet (2000)

Deep Impact > Happythankyoumoreplease

Deep Impact < How I Live Now

Final spot: #1866 out of 3849, or 52%.

Ford V Ferrari (2019)

IMDb plot summary: American car designer Carroll Shelby and driver Ken Miles battle corporate interference and the laws of physics to build a revolutionary race car for Ford in order to defeat Ferrari at the 24 Hours of Le Mans in 1966.

Directed by James Mangold. Starring Matt Damon, Christian Bale, and Jon Bernthal.

Ford V Ferrari tells the story of the Ford auto company’s attempt to build a car that would be competitive in the racing field. The king of Formula One at that time was Ferrari, and so Ford executives go out of their way to hire Matt Damon and Christian Bale as the drivers and mechanics to create their unique vehicle. Most of the drama comes in not only wondering whether they will be able to complete the task, but also in how much of the executive corporation red tape the two have to bow down to. Bale in particular is resistant to any instructions from “the man.” This is one that I am a little sad to have not seen in theaters. It's clearly intended to be viewed on a big screen, with the sight and sound of the racetrack completely engulfing the viewers. It was also a weird movie to watch right after air, which is another sports related biopic starring Matt Damon. But it is an interesting movie and it does an excellent job of showing off the adrenaline of racing in a way that a lot of other car movies never quite pull off. I don't know that it's Best Picture Oscar nomination worthy, but it is a well done fun ride, and if you already like car or sports movies I'm sure it will be that much more exciting.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Ford v Ferrari < The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Ford v Ferrari > Goldfinger

Ford v Ferrari > Outbreak

Ford v Ferrari > Top Gun

Ford v Ferrari > Maverick

Ford v Ferrari < Malcolm X

Ford v Ferrari < Christine

Ford v Ferrari > Dogtooth

Ford v Ferrari > Spider-Man: Homecoming

Ford v Ferrari > It Comes at Night

Ford v Ferrari > The Adventures of Huck Finn

Ford v Ferrari > A Delicate Balance

Final spot: #2014 out of 3845, or 48%.

Air (2023)

IMDb plot summary: Follows the history of sports marketing executive Sonny Vaccaro, and how he led Nike in its pursuit of the greatest athlete in the history of basketball, Michael Jordan.

Directed by Ben Affleck. Starring Matt Damon, Jason Bateman, and Ben Affleck.

Air is the real life story of how Nike revitalized their image by signing Michael Jordan as their spokesperson. This happened at a very low point in Nike's history, where they were unable to compete with competitors like Adidas and Converse. Matt Damon plays the worker in charge of sports representation who lays everything on the line and plays some really big risks to ensure that they get Jordan. This is a well crafted movie, with some clever and interesting dialogue as we follow the different people trying to be persuaded one way or the other. Viola Davis as Michael Jordan's mother turns into star performance, probably unsurprisingly. But the whole cast is pretty solid and they gel together to tell a satisfying, if not earth shattering, story. It is probably the closest I'll ever get to caring about celebrity spokespeople of any kind. This all sounds like very faint praise, but if any of this seems like something you'll enjoy, you probably will. If you're not interested in it to begin with, you might still appreciate it just by virtue of its being told well.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Air > The Gray Man

Air < Dark Passage

Air > Dan in Real Life

Air < Batman Returns

Air > Logan

Air < Nine to Five

Air < The Boys of Paul Street

Air < The Horse's Mouth

Air > The Whistleblower

Air < The Ghost and Mrs. Muir

Air < 21 Up

Air < Loins of Punjab Presents

Final spot: #1310 out of 3835, or 66%.

Bringing Out the Dead (1999)

IMDb plot summary: Haunted by the patients he failed to save, a monumentally burned-out Manhattan ambulance paramedic fights to maintain his sanity over three increasingly turbulent nights.

Directed by Martin Scorsese. Starring Nicolas Cage, Patricia Arquette, and John Goodman.

Bringing out the Dead is a 1999 Martin Scorsese movie starring Nicolas Cage as an ambulance driver and paramedic. We follow him over the course of three nights and see how he is perpetually burned out and absolutely not in a state of being able to function as an effective first responder. Throughout his various trips with various partners, he also spend some time getting to know the adult daughter of a man he brings in to the hospital, played by Patricia Arquette. This is such a sad, difficult movie, and it is especially adept at its use of lighting  to lean into Cage's exhausted mental state. As we follow him around and hear his musing on death and life and meaning, we're also seeing a truly broken medical system. Many of the people he picks up along the way need a social worker or a mental health advocate more than they do a trip to the ER, but this is all we have to offer them. The mood of the movie sat with me long after the credits rolled. It's a tough watch but it is an impactful one.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Bringing Out the Dead > The Blues Brothers

Bringing Out the Dead > Dark Passage

Bringing Out the Dead > The White Tiger

Bringing Out the Dead < Dead Ringers

Bringing Out the Dead < Dick Tracy

Bringing Out the Dead < Romancing the Stone

Bringing Out the Dead < The Bride Wore Black

Bringing Out the Dead > Revengers Tragedy

Bringing Out the Dead < The Fallout

Bringing Out the Dead < Big Hero 6

Bringing Out the Dead < Leap of Faith

Bringing Out the Dead < The Great Muppet Caper

Final spot: #465 out of 3839, or 88%.

The Salesman (2016)

IMDb plot summary: While Ranaa and Emad, a married couple, are participating in a production of "Death of a Salesman," she is assaulted in their new home, which leaves him determined to find the perpetrator over his wife's traumatized objections.

Directed by Asghar Farhadi. Starring Taraneh Alidoosti, Shahab Hosseini, and Mina Sadati.

The Salesman is an Iranian film about a couple who are involved in a local production of Death of a Salesman, thus the title. But after the couple moves into a new home abruptly, the wife is attacked by an intruder, and the rest of the film follows her and her husband's attempts to deal with the aftermath. Like other films by the same director, this is a slow moving film that rests heavily on just watching characters interact in very human ways. The catalyst of this story, the actual attack, is never actually seen to my recollection, but we see the after effects of it so clearly that it feels just as vivid as anything in the rest of the film. I also love that we see the difference between the two ways that the husband and the wife respond to this, whether it's by seeking revenge or just trying to go on as normal, and watching the tension escalate is a lot more thrilling than I would have expected from the pace of this movie. It's well made, it's worth watching.

How it entered my Flickchart:

The Salesman > The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

The Salesman < Dark Passage

The Salesman < Don’t Look Up

The Salesman > Is It Fall Yet?

The Salesman > Spider-Man 2

The Salesman > Event Horizon

The Salesman > Space Sweepers

The Salesman < Die Hard

The Salesman > A Scanner Darkly

The Salesman > The Romantics

The Salesman < The Night Before

Final spot: #1459 out of 3841, or 62%.

Two Lovers and a Bear (2016)

IMDb plot summary: Set in a small town near the North Pole where roads lead to nowhere, the story follows Roman and Lucy, two burning souls who come together to make a leap for life and inner peace.

Directed by Kim Nguyen. Starring Tatiana Maslany, Dane DeHaan, and Gordon Pinsent.

Two Lovers and a Bear is a romance set up in a small Arctic village, where two young adults -- sometimes seeming so young as to make me wonder if they're actual teenagers -- attempt to face their trauma together. Dane DeHaan and Tatiana Maslany are the leads here, and they make this whole film and its very narrow claustrophobic atmosphere work. You sense right from the beginning that these lovers are basically doomed but can't help rooting for them as they try to (sometimes very literally) run from the ghosts that haunt them. If the film were any longer it would feel too aimless and meandering, but as it stands it gives us just enough time to care about these characters and just enough action for us to stay connected. I also appreciate how casually it incorporates a fantastical element (or perhaps it isn't intended to be taken literally -- I chose to do so). This is definitely one that I think will sit with me for a long time after this viewing. It had that kind of weighty effect on me.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Two Lovers and a Bear > The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Two Lovers and a Bear > The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

Two Lovers and a Bear > The White Tiger

Two Lovers and a Bear > Fatal Attraction

Two Lovers and a Bear < A Night at the Opera

Two Lovers and a Bear < Mirai

Two Lovers and a Bear < Hot Fuzz

Two Lovers and a Bear < Moxie

Two Lovers and a Bear < Everything Everywhere All at Once

Two Lovers and a Bear > 28 Days Later...

Two Lovers and a Bear < Equus

Two Lovers and a Bear > Tick, Tick... Boom!

Final spot: #236 out of 3850, or 94%.

OMG!: Oh My God (2012)

IMDb plot summary: A shopkeeper takes God to court when his shop is destroyed by an earthquake.

Directed by Umesh Shukla. Starring Paresh Rawal, Akshay Kumar, and Mithun Chakraborty.

OMG: Oh My God is an Indian movie about an atheist storekeeper who loudly denounces his faith in God, only for his shop to be destroyed in an earthquake. The insurance company won't pay out since it's considered an act of God, so he goes to court to argue that either the insurance company or God himself should pay to replace his shop. (And along the way, God actually shows up.) This is actually kind of a fascinating look at a very religious society that is not the one I grew up in but certainly shares some similarities, and it examines how easy it is for those in power to use religion as a way to take advantage of people in need. It's easy to root for our main character as he fights against the greedy leaders, and every win he gets *feels* like a win. Even when the supernatural actually makes its way into the story, it's very much reinforcing the idea that the best aspects of religious groups are about helping those in need, which is very close to my own personal faith beliefs. I say all this as if the movie is some kind of deep treatise on faith and religion, when mostly it's just a fun lighthearted courtroom comedy -- which it does pretty well. But there's also some deeper food for thought in here.

How it entered my Flickchart:

OMG: Oh My God > The Gray Man

OMG: Oh My God < The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

OMG: Oh My God > Dan in Real Life

OMG: Oh My God < Batman Returns

OMG: Oh My God > Logan

OMG: Oh My God > Joe Versus the Volcano

OMG: Oh My God < Up in the Air

OMG: Oh My God < Under the Skin

OMG: Oh My God < Evita

OMG: Oh My God < The Pirate Movie

OMG: Oh My God < There Will Be Blood

OMG: Oh My God < Nine to Five

Final spot: #1259 out of 3837, or 67%.

A Haunting in Venice (2023)

IMDb plot summary: In post-World War II Venice, Poirot, now retired and living in his own exile, reluctantly attends a seance. But when one of the guests is murdered, it is up to the former detective to once again uncover the killer.

Directed by Kenneth Branagh. Starring Kenneth Branagh, Michelle Yeoh, and Jamie Dornan.

A Haunting in Venice is the newest Hercule Poirot story from Kenneth Branagh. In this one, he's invited to a palazzo to observe a famous medium attempt to speak with the owner's deceased daughter. Poirot attends to debunk the medium's performance but finds himself doubting his skepticism when a murderer strikes and he begins seeing strange visions. I enjoyed Murder on the Orient Express and was deeply disappointed with Death on the Nile in comparison, but this is a fun return to form. And by form, I mean "not worrying too much about the story, just pouring all the energy into the atmosphere." It does do that irritating thing Branagh likes where it insists on shoehorning in a Poirot tragic back story, when really a Christie mystery is all about the one-off side characters and Poirot's just there to tie them together. (Benoit Blanc gets this right in modern times, by the way.) But the eerie supernatural undertones and moody haunted castle imagery works for me almost entirely, even when the plot falls short.

How it entered my Flickchart:

A Haunting in Venice > Arthur Christmas

A Haunting in Venice > Dark Passage

A Haunting in Venice < Tucker and Dale vs. Evil

A Haunting in Venice < Spencer

A Haunting in Venice > Kismet

A Haunting in Venice < Judgment at Nuremberg

A Haunting in Venice > Flee

A Haunting in Venice < The Red Shoes

A Haunting in Venice > Holiday (1930)

A Haunting in Venice < Roxanne

A Haunting in Venice > Last Night in Soho

Final spot: #800 out of 3842, or 79%.

A Jazzman's Blues (2022)

IMDb plot summary: Follows an investigation into an unsolved murder unveiling a story full of forbidden love, deceit and a secret.

Directed by Tyler Perry. Starring Joshua Boone, Amirah Vann, and Solea Pfeiffer.

A Jazzman's Blues tells the story of an African American man in the South in the 40s who flees the vengeful white lawmen of his town and ends up becoming an acclaimed jazz performer in a nightclub. I'm pretty sure this is my first Tyler Perry movie, and it's definitely got a distinctive feel that reminds me of a cross between presentational theater and schlocky CW dramas. While I love my fair share of those, I couldn't quite settle into this vibe, though. I kept being put off by the soap opera-style dramatic revelations and how expository all the dialogue was. It does have some really enjoyable musical numbers, though, and I kept feeling myself *just* on the edge of enjoying it for real in its own unique flavor. It definitely makes me want to watch more Perry films and see if a little more exposure can help me settle into it and have a good time with it, even if this one didn't quite do the trick for me.

How it entered my Flickchart:

A Jazzman's Blues < Arthur Christmas

A Jazzman's Blues < Goldfinger

A Jazzman's Blues > Cocktail

A Jazzman's Blues > The Blue Dahlia

A Jazzman's Blues > The Cocoanuts

A Jazzman's Blues < BASEketball

A Jazzman's Blues > Find Me Guilty

A Jazzman's Blues < The Shaggy Dog (1959)

A Jazzman's Blues > The Lorax (1972)

A Jazzman's Blues > Man of the Year

A Jazzman's Blues > Jane Eyre (1996)

A Jazzman's Blues < Gladiator

Final spot: #2960 out of 3843, or 23%.

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day (2014)

IMDb plot summary: Alexander's day begins with gum stuck in his hair, followed by more calamities. However, he finds little sympathy from his family and begins to wonder if bad things only happen to him.

Directed by Miguel Arteta. Starring Steve Carell, Jennifer Garner, and Ed Oxenbould.

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day is a full length children's feature film based extremely loosely on the picture book of the same name. To expand this story out to an hour and a half, we tell the story of how Alexander is having struggles and is irritated with his family's optimism, so he makes a birthday wish that they all have terrible days. Then the whole family has a terrible day, and he has to be the one to be optimistic for them. I just watched a string of pretty decent kids films that were entertaining even if clearly not made for me. This is not one of those. This one is for kids and only for kids. The jokes are juvenile and the relationships are unrelatable for adults. It does have a nice message about balancing positivity with acknowledging that sometimes things are just difficult, and that's a good message to send to children. But it's absolutely not made with anyone beyond its target audience in mind and never really reaches beyond that. So since I'm not a child and do not have children, all I can say is it's not for me.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day < The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day < Goldfinger

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day > Cocktail

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day > The Blue Dahlia

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day < Davy Crockett, King of the Wild Frontier

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day < The Westing Game

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day < Toys

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day < Robots

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day > Life With Father

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day < Predator

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day > X-Men: The Last Stand

Final spot: #3115 out of 3846, or 19%.

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (2017)

IMDb plot summary: A dark force threatens Alpha, a vast metropolis and home to species from a thousand planets. Special operatives Valerian and Laureline must race to identify the marauding menace and safeguard not just Alpha, but the future of the universe.

Directed by Luc Besson. Starring Dane DeHaan, Cara Delevingne, and Clive Owen.

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets is a sci-fi story set centuries in the future when interstellar travel is common. We follow law enforcement officer Valerian and his partner as they try to track down a smuggled artifact that may belong to a mysterious world Valerian's been dreaming about with no official record. Watching this made me want to go back and give The Fifth Element another shot, because this is what I wanted Fifth Element to be -- big and silly and a world that feels so chock full of characters and worlds that I'll never possibly get a chance to see all of them in this film. Its sense of humor every so often gets perhaps a bit *too* silly, but it doesn't feel too disparate against these bright, fun visuals. I would happily watch an entire series set in this world. Sci-fi and fantasy too often portray the same kinds of alien creatures over and over again, and I loved how fresh and creative a lot of these characters felt, especially in combination with each other. A big bold fun attempt even when its big risks don't quite land.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets > The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets < Key Largo

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets > Nobody’s Fool

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets < Waking Ned Devine

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets > A Tale of Two Sisters

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets > Nine to Five

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets < What’s Eating Gilbert Grape

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets > The Polka King

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets > Death By Hanging

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets > The French Dispatch

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets < The Shoes of the Fisherman

Final spot: #1234 out of 3840, or 68%.

Henry V (1944)

IMDb plot summary: In the midst of the Hundred Years' War, the young King Henry V of England embarks on the conquest of France in 1415.

Directed by Laurence Olivier. Starring Laurence Olivier, Robert Newton, and Leslie Banks.

Henry V is a 1940s adaptation of the Shakespeare play of the same name, starring Laurence Olivier as King Henry. The plot is a pretty straightforward war story, but it's the set design and technical details that set this one apart. The first act is set up as if it is a filmed live performance within Shakespeare's Globe Theater itself, complete with audience reactions to the jokes and occasional glimpses of backstage shenanigans. However as the story goes on, the sets become more and more realistic and leave that gimmick behind. I almost wish that it had spent the entire movie in that gimmick because it was by far the most interesting piece of it. Granted, I'll admit that I really don't like this play very much to begin with; I find it tedious and with nothing for me to grab onto narratively. Because of that, it was exciting for me to initially see a unique take on it. And the entire film is steeped in these gorgeous Technicolor designs and Hughes that absolutely makes it beautiful to look at. It's probably just my own fault that this is not the show to win me over, but I did love looking at those sets and costumes.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Henry V < The Blues Brothers

Henry V > Beauty and the Bestie

Henry V < No Highway in the Sky

Henry V > Follow Thru

Henry V > Rancho Notorious

Henry V < Adventures in Babysitting

Henry V < Hal King (what an interesting combo there)

Henry V > Double Jeopardy

Henry V > Nowhere Boy

Henry V < Mud

Henry V < Buffalo Soldiers

Henry V < Marry Me

Final spot: #2492 out of 3832, or 35%.

Memories of Murder (2003)

IMDb plot summary: In a small Korean province in 1986, two detectives struggle with the case of multiple young women being found raped and murdered by an unknown culprit.

Directed by Bong Joon Ho. Starring Song Kang-ho, Kim Sang-kyung, and Kim Roe-ha.

Memories of Murder is a Bong Joon Ho movie from South Korea, based on loosely an actual string of murders committed in the country that went for years without being solved. (Interestingly, the killer confessed to the murders after this movie came out, and I believe I even read that he had indeed seen the movie, so that's a weird fact.) The story centers primarily on the police who are trying to track down this killer, and how easy they find it to do terrible things like torture suspects and plant evidence that will lead to a conviction even if they know that it's not accurate. Like many of Bong’s movies I found myself having to go look this one up after I was finished with it to help me process how it ended. It's in many ways a typical crime procedural, but the casualness of the police cruelty really builds to a an unsettling climax in the final scenes. It's not the kind of story that I typically seek out but I think it is well told and I think Bong Joon Ho is a master at his craft, so it's no surprise that this is a really well crafted film. I wonder if I return to it after a little time if it will have a stronger impact on me, because even after just one viewing I can feel the weight that this story can carry with it.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Memories of Murder > The Blues Brothers

Memories of Murder < Dark Passage

Memories of Murder > The Tragedy of Macbeth

Memories of Murder > Corrina, Corrina

Memories of Murder < Nerve

Memories of Murder < The Faculty

Memories of Murder < Wonder Man

Memories of Murder < A Bug’s Life

Memories of Murder < The Vanishing

Memories of Murder < Seven Chances

Memories of Murder < The Country Girl

Memories of Murder < Waking Ned Devine

Final spot: #1203 out of 3848, or 69%.

Woman in Gold (2015)

IMDb plot summary: Maria Altmann, an octogenarian Jewish refugee, takes on the Austrian government to recover artwork she believes rightfully belongs to her family.

Directed by Simon Curtis. Starring Helen Mirren, Ryan Reynolds, and Daniel Brühl.

Woman in Gold stars Helen Mirren as an Austrian refugee fighting to reclaim family heirlooms stolen by Nazis decades earlier and Ryan Reynolds as the young lawyer who decides to represent her. This is based on a real-life case, and the actual facts are much more interesting than the standard biopic treatment this gets. The script and all the story beats are pretty well telegraphed from early on. I did however find a lot to latch on to in the acting. Helen Mirren is, of course, always excellent, and here she does an excellent job balancing the raging emotion and the calm decisive action of the character. And I'm reminded that I really enjoy Ryan Reynolds as a dramatic actor. He brings an earnest charisma to his role here as a young lawyer who is out of his depth but really wants to do the right thing. So we do have two good performances in a pretty mediocre movie. Possibly worth watching, but possibly also worth just reading about the story yourself and skipping the movie adaptation.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Woman in Gold < The Blues Brothers

Woman in Gold > Prince Caspian and the Voyage of the Dawn Treader

Woman in Gold > Outbreak

Woman in Gold < The King and I

Woman in Gold > Little Norse Prince

Woman in Gold > Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire

Woman in Gold > Skylark

Woman in Gold > Wind River

Woman in Gold > Hercules

Woman in Gold > Blue’s Big Musical Movie

Woman in Gold > Avengers: Infinity War

Final spot: #2166 out of 3847, or 44%.

Theater Camp (2023)

IMDb plot summary: The eccentric staff of a rundown theater camp in upstate New York must band together with the beloved founder's bro-y son to keep the camp afloat.

Directed by Molly Gordon and Nick Lieberman. Starring Ben Platt, Molly Gordon, and Noah Galvin.

Theatre Camp is a mockumentary about a summer theater program for children. The beloved founder of the camp has had some unexpected health difficulties and her son is attempting to run the summer program in her absence, despite having no idea what he is doing. We follow a series of different subplots trying to make all the summer shows come together. As someone who works in educational theater and has had quite a few of her own summer theater camp experiences, this absolutely works for me. The jokes nearly all land, and yet the theater kid in me is still drawn into the sentimentality of theater being the thing that changes people. I laughed out loud several times during this, but it also absolutely reminded me why I love this art form so much and how magical it can be working on that with a group of young enthusiastic actors. But also it's just a funny and entertaining movie. I think it would also be entertaining even for folks who are not involved in the theater world at all. The characters are still entertaining, the arcs are still enjoyably silly, and even a lot of the theater in-jokes are structured in such a way that the gist of the joke would get across to even the folks unfamiliar with it. Definitely a delightful watch.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Theater Camp > The Blues Brothers

Theater Camp > The Heart is a Lonely Hunter

Theater Camp < Tucker and Dale vs. Evil

Theater Camp < Spencer

Theater Camp > Shiva Baby

Theater Camp > Au Revoir Les Enfants

Theater Camp > The Incredibles

Theater Camp > Atonement

Theater Camp > The Bumblebee Flies Anyway

Theater Camp > Raya and the Last Dragon

Theater Camp > Onward

Final spot: #720 out of 3838, or 81%.

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody (2022)

IMDb plot summary: A joyous, emotional, heartbreaking celebration of the life and music of Whitney Houston, one of the greatest female R&B pop vocalists of all time, tracking her journey from obscurity to musical super stardom.

Directed by Kasi Lemmons. Starring Naomi Ackie, Stanley Tucci, and Ashton Sanders.

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance With Somebody is a musical biopic of Whitney Houston's musical career. It follows her from her early breakthrough, to her relationship with Bobby Brown, to her substance abuse issues, to her untimely death. The music numbers all use Houston's original vocals with actress Naomi Ackie lip syncing along to them. Like so many biopics, this tries so hard to fit every aspect of Houston's life in that it fails a little bit as a narrative because it can't quite cohere them into something with a thematic throughline. And of course that's because life itself doesn't have a thematic throughline, but it still makes me wish I'd watched a documentary about Houston's life rather than this somewhat lifeless interpretation of her work. In fact, it did the one thing that a good documentary about Houston's life should absolutely do, which was make me want to go and actually listen to Houston's music. There's a not a lot to be gained from dramatizing it the way it is here. It's a harmless biopic primarily but it's also an uninteresting one.

How it entered my Flickchart:

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody < The Blues Brothers

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody > Prince Caspian and the Voyage of the Dawn Treader

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody < Outbreak

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody > Follow Thru

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody > Teacher of the Year

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody < Adventures in Babysitting

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody > Red Notice

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody < V/H/S

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody > The Man Who Came to Dinner

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody < The Kid Who Would be King

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody < Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World

Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody < Coraline

Final spot: #2479 out of 3836, or 35%.